Scratchpad

Over the last couple of years I've been slowly making my way through every Disney animated feature film and, having recently watched Wish (which will be in my next batch of reviews) I've now seen all of them - that is until Moana 2 releases later this year. So I'm now presenting my official tier list which is the definitive ranking of all 62 Disney films (each tier goes from best to worst so it's all in order). S Tier (10/10) - Beauty and the Beast / Fantasia / The Lion King / Pinocchio / Snow White and the Seven Dwarfs A Tier (8-9/10) - Aladdin / Sleeping Beauty / Lilo and Stitch / Alice in Wonderland / One Hundred and One Dalmatians / Tarzan / Fantasia 2000 / The Princess and the Frog / Bolt / The Jungle Book / Robin Hood / The Little Mermaid / The Rescuers / Hercules B Tier (7/10) - Mulan / The Great Mouse Detective / Cinderella / Big Hero 6 / Zootopia / Tangled / Moana / The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh / Frozen / Brother Bear / The Rescuers Down Under / The Fox and the Hound / Pocahontas / Wreck It Ralph / Peter Pan / The Hunchback of Notre Dame / Treasure Planet / The Three Caballeros C Tier (5-6/10) - The Lady and the tr*mp / The Emperor's New Groove / The Aristocats / Bambi / Strange World / Encanto / Atlantis The Lost Empire / Oliver and Company / The Sword in the Stone / Winnie the Pooh / Ralph Breaks the Internet / Meet The Robinsons / Dumbo / Raya and the Last Dragon / Saludos Amigos / The Adventures of Ichabod and Mr. Toad / The Black Cauldron / Wish / Frozen 2 F Tier (sh*t) - Make Mine Music / Melody Time / Fun and Fancy Free / Dinosaur / Home on the Range / Chicken Little

What I Watched This Week #149 (Nov 4-10) And Then There Were None dir. Rene Clair/1945/1h38m Adapted from the Agatha Christie novel – the world's best selling mystery book, which has a rather unfortunate original title that you'll have to Google for yourself – this tells the story of ten strangers invited to an island off the English coast by an unknown host. There they discover that they are all responsible for somebody's death, and soon they start dropping off one by one. This setup sounds clichéd now but you can't make that argument here as this story invented that cliché. What I like here is how playful and light the direction is, giving the film a macabre sense of humour. This is also true of the performances, particularly those of Barry Fitzgerald as Judge Quinncannon and Walter Huston as Dr. Armstrong. The mystery itself is a good one and had me guessing up to the reveal. I don't think this is as good as the Margaret Rutherford Miss Marple films of the 60s, or the Peter Ustinov's Poirot films from the 70s, but if you're a fan of a good murder mystery then you will enjoy this. 7.5/10 Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon dir. Ang Lee/2000/2h This fantasy martial arts film stars Michelle Yeoh and Chow Yun-fat as two master warriors, Yu Shu Lien and Li Mu Bai, who must work together to track down a powerful sword that was stolen by a young thief, Jen (Zhang Ziyi), who is also the daughter of a nobleman. This is a gorgeous looking film full of vibrant colours that is famous for its spectacular wire work that sees the characters float and fly through the air. This makes for some unique fight sequences where they hop along rooftops or duel high up in a bamboo forest. The two leads are both great, especially in the scenes they share where they have to deal with their repressed feelings for each other. I did feel like there were some pacing issues early on, and the story becomes slightly convoluted just for the sake of creating more drama, but it does tie up quite nicely at the end where Jen is able to find some freedom and an identity of her own that isn't defined by anyone else, that is if you take it symbolically. 8/10 A Quiet Place dir. John Krasinski/2018/1h31m Emily Blunt and John Krasinski (who also directs) are the parents of three young children living in a world populated by blind creatures that hunt by sound, forcing them to live silently. Adding a ticking clock to proceedings is the fact that Blunt's character is pregnant. This film has a brilliantly tense atmosphere that is sustained through the entire runtime with a couple of standout set pieces that had me on the edge of my seat. I'm not a huge fan of the design of the creatures and I feel like we see them too much but the always feel like a threat. Blunt and Krasinski both do a good job and have a natural chemistry which is to be expected as they are married in real life, but the real star of the film is Millicent Simmonds as their daughter Regan who is deaf (as is Simmonds). This feeds nicely into the film as it allows them to communicate by sign language, something very useful in a world like this, and also has other ramifications later on. 8/10 Heroes Shed No Tears dir. John Woo/1986/1h33m Heroes Shed No Tears is John Woo's first proper action film and he cements his reputation for b*lls to the wall mayhem and org*es of explosions right out of the gate – although I didn't see any doves. Eddy Ko Hung stars as Chan Chung, leader of a group of Chinese mercenaries hired by the Thai government to kidnap a druglord. That's the easy part, getting out alive is the hard part, especially with an insane General (Bruce Jang Il-Sik) hunting them down. This film is relentless with hardly a few minutes passing before a shoot out or something blows up, with those gaps filled with an entertainingly dramatic narrative that veers into melodrama as Chung's wife and young son are caught up in the action. It does feel somewhat disjointed at times, with one particularly long gambling scene there just for comedic relief. Not as polished as his later works, that rough and ready vibe gives it charm, and a supporting cast of likeable characters make this a fun watch. 8/10 Firebrand dir. Karim Ainouz/2023/2h Firebrand is a historical drama about Katherine Parr (Alicia Vikander), the sixth and final wife of King Henry VIII (Jude Law). Anyone paying attention in history class will recall the method for remembering the fates of his wives – divorced beheaded died, divorced beheaded survived – so we know she doesn't meet a bloody end, so the film does an excellent job of building the tension and sense of threat in their relationship. At this point Henry is getting sicker and sicker from an infected wound in his leg and his increasing paranoia makes him a volatile character. Law does a brilliant job here, managing to go from a pathetic, weak figure to an imposing monster, often in the same scene. This may be the best performance he's ever given. Vikander is equally impressive. Her Parr is a powerful woman – she was made regent while Henry was abroad fighting – but aware that her life is always on the line. An excellent supporting cast including Eddie Marsan as Edward Seymour and Simon Russell Beale as the scheming Bishop Gardiner, and vivid period costumes and production design round out an enthralling film. 9/10 Lime's Film of the Week! Respect dir. Benoit Forgeard/2011/14m This short film is about a man, Steph (Thibault Sauvaige) having an argument with his partner over breakfast, only that his partner is Flippy, an anthropomorphic bear mascot for a breakfast cereal. Flippy is a controlling *sshole who is physically and verbally abusive to Steph, who wants to leave to go to ninja school. There's a sense of absurdity and playfulness here that is let down by the blandness of the production. Everything about it feels flat, the direction, lighting and performances, with none of it matching the tone of the story. But there is something about the concept that piqued my interest enough to check out another of the director's films. 5/10 f*ck UK dir. Benoit Forgeard/2012/13m Another absurd short from Benoit Forgeard, f*ck UK follows the exploits of Michel (Gaspard Proust), leader of a fringe group that hates the UK and wants to wipe every trace of anything British from France. But it turns out that this is all because he's in love with an English woman, Jane (Julia Vandoorne), who he is angry at - “I am French, you are strange. I will never come to your country of sh*t”. The direction is much better here than in Respect with a nice use of montage, and this film is actually funny with some laugh out loud moments. More of a sketch than a film this also benefits from a solid performance from Proust as the surly and childishly petulant Brit hater. 7/10 10 Rillington Place dir. Richard Fleischer/1971/1h46m Based on a true story, 10 Rillington Place stars Richard Attenborough as John Christie, a softly spoken middle aged man who rents out flats at the titular address in which he also lives in late 40s London. He also happens to be a serial killer. When he rents out a flat to simple, trusting Timothy Evans (John Hurt) and his wife Beryl (Judy Geeson) he finds another target, and someone to take the blame. This is a thriller that is chilling in its restraint, building up the tension masterfully. This is all down to the performance from Attenborough who manages to channel the menace he showed in Brighton Rock as an angry young man and suppress it all internally as an older man who now knows how to focus his rage. A young Hurt is also good, giving a very sympathetic performance as an innocent man in way over his head and accused of a crime he didn't commit, though he does come across as a bit too naïve at times. The film also has a epilogue that isn't really needed. Sure, it's nice to know that Christie eventually went on to face justice, but there's a much better ending place, narratively speaking, a few minutes earlier. 8.5/10 Austin Powers in Goldmember dir. Jay Roach/2002/1h34m Mike Myers is back for the final time as the swinging 60s superspy, again battling Dr. Evil (also Myers), who this time has teamed up with 70s disco kingpin Goldmember (also also Myers) to hold the world hostage. Powers is assisted by former girlfriend Foxxy Cleopatra (Beyoncé) and his father Nigel Powers (Michael Caine). Also returning are Dr. Evil's henchmen Mini Me (Verne Troyer) and Fat b*stard (also also also Myers). Opening with a spoof of a spoof that sees Tom Cruise play Powers in a Mission Impossible rip off directed by Steven Spielberg, this is a film that knows what it is and will make any stupid joke to get a laugh, with most of them landing. The plot is basically pointless, with it being just a vehicle for Myers to play around and it's as much fun to watch as it must have been to make. Caine is hilarious as the elder Powers getting good use of his under utilised talent for comedy and Goldmember might be my favourite one dimensional character in any comedy. I also love that the ending of this comedy spoof of a Bond film was later used as an actual plot point for the actual Bond film Spectre. Not as good as the original, I'd say that this and the second film are about equal and are still a lot of fun to watch. 7/10

Galactic War update. Day 278-284

Throne of Blood (1957) dir Akira Kurosawa This is Kurosawa's version of Macbeth. It's not like the more usual Shakespearian adaptations that use the original lines, rather it's the same basic story with different lines in a different setting; medieval Japan. It's unmistakeably Macbeth right from the start as the camera pans across a misty, mysterious, highland landscape. Toshirô Mifune stars Washizu (i.e. Macbeth), initially a soldier (I guess you would say Samurai, although I am not totally sure of the correct usage of that) in the army of the local lord (i.e. King Duncan). Washizu and another soldier, Miki (i.e. Macduff), are on the way back from a victorious battle to their lord's castle. They get lost in forest and come across a spirit (equivalent of the witches) who foretells their promotion and that eventually Washizu will be the new lord but it will be Miki's son who succeeds him. They are promoted, Washizu tells his wife (Lady Macbeth, obviously) about the prophecy and it is she who encourages him on the path of deceit, betrayal and murder that will see him full-fill the rest of the prophecy but attempt to change it so that a son of his own succeeds him. One thing I did find slightly odd, and funny, is that whereas in Shakespeare's original (and the historical facts it is based on) Macbeth becomes King of Scotland, here Washizu becomes Lord of Spider's Web Castle. I am assuming that in Japanese “Spider's Web Castle” sounds more impressive than it does in English. It is very well made, of course, and the actors are good, particularly Isuzu Yamada as Lady Washizu. Like Olivier's Shakespeare adaptions it does not seem dated, and I think the Shakespearian style is what helps there. There is some very impressive cinematography, both of the landscapes and some of the castle interior scenes. One that sticks in my mind is when Lady Washizu hatches one of her plans we see her walk into another room, that is pitch black and then emerge shortly after carrying some bottles of drugged saki. The camera stays fixed for all of this, with the doorway to the dark room in the centre so it's almost like she disappears and then reappears, as if using magic. Definitely well worth watching if you are into Shakespeare or Samurai films. 9 / 10

Here's the last thing I bought! It's mighty expensive at $1600, but it makes a easy go of a complex operation. Set it and forget it and keep a sponge wet it's about all it takes! All it takes is a 4-day dry and a 4-day cure.