Leaderboard

T-shirt in Abu Dhabi. Got my daughter one as well, so proud of her winning a 🥉(BJJ)

What I Watched This Week #148 (Oct 28-Nov 3) Humanist Vampire Seeking Consenting Suicidal Person dir. Ariane Louis-Seize/2023/1h30m Sasha (Sara Montpetit) is a teenage vampire who, much to the exasperation of her parents, refuses to kill as she has too much empathy, a decision that is slowly killing her. She meets suicidal Paul (Felix-Antoine Benard) and he offers his life for hers, but over the course of the night the two form a bond and find a reason to live. Deadpan humour and charmingly awkward teenage romance add a lightness to what is a very deep emotional drama that is more complex than it at first seems. This put me in mind of a strange mix between A Girl Walked Home Alone at Night and Napoleon Dynamite. There's a beautifully staged scene where the two listen to an old record and, without a word, nervously steal looks at each other for an unbroken three minutes and it has more depth and meaning than most films manage in an hour and a half. You really get the feeling that you're caught up in that dramatic first flush of love where you feel like Romeo and Juliet. The two lead performances are extraordinary, especially Montpetit, and the direction has a real warmth to it despite being set mostly during the night. I loved this. 10/10 Lime's Film of the Week! Jigsaw dir. Michael Spierig, Peter Spierig/2017/1h31m Most of the time while I was watching this I was thinking “have I seen this one before..? No. No, I haven't. Wait, have I? I have! No? Oh, yeah I have”. I think this is the eighth film in the Saw franchise, and by this point they all just kind of blur into one homogenous mess. It's a shame because I think the original is a really good, tense thriller with a great, if ridiculous, twist. 2/10 Terrifier 3 dir. Damien Leone/2024/2h5m It's Christmastime and, five years after the events of the last film, Art the Clown (David Howard Thornton) is back playing Santa and everyone is on the naughty list, especially Sienna (Lauren LaVera) who bested him the last time they met. Not as long as Terrifier 2, this is still bloated and full of ridiculous bits of lore that makes the whole thing feel like a parody at times, I actually found myself invested in the character of Sienna here. I think LaVera does a decent job in portraying the trauma and PTSD she's suffering after the last film. Again, the gore here is very well done but so gross that it becomes banal. The best thing about this film, as is the case with the others, is Thornton's performance as Art who manages to be both creepy and funny. 4/10 Immaculate dir. Michael Mohan/2024/1h29m Sydney Sweeney plays Sister Cecilia, an American nun recently arrived at a remote Italian convent. Things take a sinister turn when she becomes pregnant despite being a v*rgin and she starts to think that all is not so holy at the convent. This religious horror doesn't do anything new and owes a huge debt to the likes of Rosemary's Baby but it does do a very good job of ramping up the tension and supernatural elements at a deliberate pace until it's ready to go for broke in the final act. There are a couple of unexpectedly gruesome moments that shocked me more then anything in the Terrifier films precisely because they are so unexpected. Sweeney gives a good performance as a true believer who must become a fighter in order to survive, and there are a couple of memorable supporting performances from Dora Romano as the Mother Superiour and Alvaro Morte as the charismatic Father Tedeschi. A well made, if uninspiring, thriller with a memorable smash cut to black ending, emphasis on the smash. 7/10 Joker: Folie a Deux dir. Todd Phillips/2024/2h18m This sequel to 2019's Joker picks up from the end of that film with Arthur Fleck (Joaquin Phoenix) in prison awaiting his trial for multiple murders. While inside he meets and forms a relationship with Lee Quinzel (Lady Gaga), the two seeming to make the perfect couple. The first film was a well made rip off of Scorsese's The King of Comedy elevated by an incredible performance from Phoenix that didn't need a sequel. Thankfully this isn't taking the predictable route of charting Fleck as he wreaks havoc as the crown prince of crime but instead does something interesting and sees him try to face his many mental health problems while struggling to break free of his anarchic alter ego. This hasn't gone down well with comic book fans as it strays far from the source material, but not being a big comic book guy myself that isn't an issue for me. Phoenix is once again excellent, really giving his all in his performance. Gaga is also good and I liked how her character became a kind of antagonist in always pushing Arthur to be Joker. Brendon Gleeson has a supporting role as the lead prison guard and as much as I like him, and he does give a good performance with what he's given here, his character is too much of a caricature, one scene even implying that he and some other guards r*pe Arthur. Steve Coogan also pops up in one scene as a television reporter interviewing Arthur and it just came across as Alan Partridge doing a bad American accent to me. I haven't mentioned it yet but this film is also a musical - another sticking point for a lot of people – and I think it works well at portraying Arthur's mental state. I loved the moments where we go full fantasy and Arthur and Lee are singing and dancing on an old school style soundstage like a musical from the 40s and 50s. But I am a musical fan so I'm probably biased. Don't believe the anti-hype, not everything here works but it's going for something different and for that alone it should be commended, and I honestly think it's better than the original. 8.5/10 Piece by Piece dir. Morgan Neville/2024/1h34m Piece by Piece is a hybrid biopic/documentary about the life and career of musician and producer Pharrell Williams starring the man himself and featuring appearances by the likes of Kendrick Lamar, Timbaland, Jay-Z, Snoop Dogg and Justin Timberlake. The gimmick here is that the whole film is animated with Lego. This makes for a playful, vibrant and imaginative film that matches Williams' method for creating music, putting it together piece by piece until you have something new. This is also a very funny film, making full use of the medium and the absurdity of everything being Lego to make some hilarious visual gags. Being a family friendly film this does smooth off some of the rough edges of his story but I still found Williams to be an open and honest subject not afraid to discuss his shortcomings. I love it when the style and form of a film like this matches its subject – Thirty Two Short Films About Glenn Gould and the David Bowie doc Moonage Daydream come to mind – and Piece by Piece does just that with its eclectic and imaginative presentation. 9/10 Strange World dir. Don Hall, Qui Nguyen/2022/1h42m Farmer Searcher Clade (Jake Gyllenhaal), son of legendary explorer Jaeger (Dennis Quaid), must go on his own adventure deep beneath the surface of the planet when his crops, which also acts as the planet's energy source, start to die. The plot here is quite simple but it has an excellent third act twist that I though worked really well and fits in with the environmental themes and message of the film. What works best here is the look of the world beneath the surface, populated by really well designed creatures that feel truly alien, as do the environments. Not quite as good is the family drama between Jaeger and Searcher and between Searcher and his son Ethan (Jaboukie Young-White). It's the classic case of simply sitting down and talking to each other would solve all their problems, but then there'd be no film. The performances are all good, with Quaid's bombastic 50s b-movie style bravado standing out to me. This won't go down as a Disney classic but there are some really good ideas here alongside some gorgeous animation. 7/10 @djw180 The Bad Sleep Well is the least faithful of his Shakespeare films, the other two are much more recognisable.

What I Watched This Week #146 (Oct 14-20) Deadpool & Wolverine dir. Shawn Levy/2024/2h8m Ryan Reynolds returns for the third time (well fourth, but no one talks about that first attempt) as the merc with the mouth, the first entry to be part of the MCU after Disney's acquisition of Fox. He must traverse the multiverse (yawn) in order to find a new Wolverine (Hugh Jackman) after the death of Wolverine Prime in the excellent Logan. Deadpool is perhaps the most predictable character in the MCU and you get exactly what you expect here – constant snarky quips, s*xual innuendo and gratuitous violence. It feels like it was written by a fourteen year old boy who needs more parental guidance. Reynolds is good as this character and he's clearly invested in it beyond getting a big pay cheque but he actually feels less developed than he did in the first film. The thing that the fans are getting excited about are the cameos, which I won't spoil here, but to me they're less about the characters and more about saying goodbye to the Fox universe of Marvel films – one of my favourite things is a sweet little montage over the end credits – which is a detriment to the actual story being told. Far and away the best thing about this film is Jackman's performance. I still think he should have let Logan be his last Wolverine film but he really gives it his all here and acts Reynolds off the screen in a couple of genuinely emotional scenes. 6.5/10 Terrifier dir. Damien Leone/2016/1h25m Terrifier is a slasher film starring David Howard Thornton as Art the Clown, a mute commedia dell'arte style black and white clown who brutally butchers a bunch of people while terrorising a couple of young women on Halloween night. This is straight up gorenography with zero effort put into story and characterisation (with the exception of Art) and everything invested in the admittedly excellent practical effects which were done by the director himself. Seriously, if you're even the slightest bit squeamish then give this one a miss. What salvages this from being a totally forgettable slasher is the character of Art and Thornton's performance which is both scary and at times pretty funny, I mean, he is a clown after all. There's one moment late on where he's trying to grab one of the girls through a door but he can't quite reach and in frustration he thrusts his arm through but instead of a weapon he's brandishing a little clown horn which he squeaks menacingly at her. I actually laughed out loud at that part. He also has really expressive facial expressions and physicality that elevates his performance. I wouldn't be surprised if Thornton has actual experience as a clown or mime. Outside of Art and the gore there is nothing that makes this film stand out from all of the other bland slasher films out there, which is a shame because I really do like that funny little guy. 5/10 Nothing Like a Dame dir. Roger Michell/2018/1h20m Nothing Like a Dame is a documentary that records a conversation between four lifelong friends and some of the greatest acting talents Britain has ever produced, Dame Judi Dench, Dame Maggie Smith, Dame Joan Plowright and Dame Eileen Atkins (hence the title). Spending time with these ladies is an absolute delight and their real friendship shines through in how open and comfortable they are with each other. Their conversation spans their careers, their relationships – particularly Plowright's marriage to Sir Laurence Olivier, who Smith didn't especially get on with – and growing old, though Dench's first reply to talking about that is hilarious, “oh f*ck off Roger”. There is a bitter sweetness to the film when they talk about growing older even if it is with humour “I think we have about three good eyes between us”, and since this was shot Dame Maggie Smith has passed on, but that just makes their enduring friendship even more beautiful. A funny, charming and cosy film. 9/10 Encanto dir. Byron Howard, Jared Bush/2021/1h42m The 60th animated feature film from Disney is all about the Madrigal family who lives in a magical house in the hills of Colombia, with each member of the family having their own unique magical ability, all except Mirabel (Stephanie Beatriz). When the house's magic starts to fade and the family start to lose their powers it's up to Mirabel to save the day. I found this to be a step up from Raya and the Last Dragon with the humour fitting the story more and a return to having the characters sing the songs. The songs are written by Lin-Manuel Miranda and they are really good but none of them really stands out above the others. This is a gorgeously animated film with a great use of colour, and I really like the way the house is alive and has a character of its own. The story didn't really grab me and I found that the conflict was resolved a little too easily at the end but this is still an entertaining and well made film with an engaging lead performance from Beatriz. 7/10 Austin Powers: The Spy Who Shagged Me dir. Jay Roach/1999/1h35m Mike Myers returns as the titular swinging superspy, this time having to travel back to the 60s after arch nemesis Dr. Evil (also Myers) steals his mojo with the aid of new henchmen Mini Me (Verne Troyer) and Fat b*stard (also also Myers). He is aided by his American counterpart Felicity Shagwell (Heather Graham). Like the first this is a loving, and totally ridiculous, spoof of the Bond series that never makes the mistake of taking itself too seriously. Where this film goes off the tracks somewhat is in its use of gross-out humour through the character of Fat b*stard. I find that it goes a bit too far for the type of film it is and it doesn't really mesh with the tone of the rest of the film. I also don't think that Graham gives a very good performance and doesn't have half the chemistry that Myers and Elizabeth Hurley did in the first film. The real star of this film is Troyer who is hilarious and gives a masterclass in physical comedy. Even his small reactions when other people are talking are funny. Next time you watch this keep your eyes on him even when he's just in the background, you won't be disappointed. 7/10 The Producers dir. Mel Brooks/1967/1h28m The first film from Mel Brooks, The Producers stars Zero Mostel as sleazy Broadway producer Max Bialystock who, with the assistance of timid accountant Leo Bloom (Gene Wilder), realises that you could make more money with a flop than a hit, as long as you don't mind a little creative accounting. They set about looking for the worst play they can find and think they hit gold when they discover Springtime for Hitler, surely nothing could go right, right? In my opinion this is Brooks' best and funniest film with two stellar performances from Mostel and Wilder. Mostel is such a force of nature here he almost bursts out of the screen and slaps you around the face. This is juxtaposed perfectly with Wilder's sadly sympathetic loser who finally finds that spark of life. The two are surrounded by a whole supporting cast of memorable characters who all leave an impression even if they're only in one scene. Kenneth Mars as Franz Liebkind, the author of the play, and Christopher Hewitt as the director Roger De Bris are some of my favourites. And then there's the play itself. If you've never seen this then just know that the musical opening to Springtime for Hitler is one of the most hilariously bad taste bits of satire ever committed to film - “we're marching to a faster pace, look out here comes the master race”, “don't be stupid be a smarty, come and join the n*zi party” - and is also a genuinely well written piece of musical theatre. One of my favourite films of all time. 10/10 Lime's Film of the Week!

The Awakening (2011) dir Nick Murphy A mild horror / ghost story / thriller set in 1920s England. Florence Cathcart (Rebecca Hall) is a relativity famous author and ghost hunter, but not what you might think. She does not believe in ghosts. She specialises in exposing false claims of hauntings and fake mediums scamming money from people grieving for sons and husbands killed in the First World War. She is asked by teacher Robert Mallory (Dominic West) to investigate claims of a ghost at the boys school he works at. The school's matron (Imelda Staunton) is a big fan of hers and the one who suggested she be employed to help put the pupils' minds at ease by showing there is no ghost. It's an interesting story with a twist in the plot and Florence's lack of belief in the supernatural is severely tested. It's not very scary nor gruesome, not that type of horror at all, and I don't think it was meant to be. It's does build up to it's scarier bits quite well and they did surprise me (as they are meant to), they just were not that scary. I quite liked the attention to detail in Florence's “ghost hunting” equipment, designed to catch people pretending to be ghosts. It all looked very authentic for that time; trip wires linked to bells and cameras also set to ignite packets of flash powder to illuminate photographs, devices with brass arrows swinging in the direction of changes in temperature etc etc. The cast is good and fortunately, for me, all but one of the school kids leave for their holidays early on, so no annoying child actors. Most of the film it is just the three characters already mentioned plus Tom, the only child who stays at school for the holidays, and a strange, suspicious handy man. The twist in the plot is good when it comes, in that it was unexpected but seemed plausible. 7 / 10

What I Watched This Week #145 (Oct 7-13) Bubba Ho-tep dir. Bruce Coscarelli/2002/1h32m The best chin in Hollywood Bruce Campbell stars as an elderly Elvis Presley wasting away in an East Texas retirement home in this horror comedy. When an ancient Egyptian mummy starts s*cking out the souls of his fellow residents Elvis and his best friend JFK (Ossie Davis) decide to do something about it. While the premise sounds ridiculous, this film is actually a nuanced and considered rumination on growing old. Whether or not these guys are really Elvis and JFK or a couple of crazy old coots isn't important at all because the themes are universal, the need to have a purpose, a reason to get out of bed in the morning, is something we can all relate to. The low budget is very obvious , especially a clearly plastic beetle that looks like something you'd buy in a cheap toy shop, but the director gets good use out of it, with the design of the mummy quite well done. What really carries this film are the two lead performances from Campbell and Davis which are both full of both dignity and pathos, particularly Campbell who really delivers in the emotional scenes. 8/10 The Boy and the Heron dir. Hayao Miyazaki/2023/2h4m The latest film from Japanese animation legend Hayao Miyazaki is set during WWII and follows teenage boy Mahito (Soma Santoki) who relocates to the country from Tokyo with his father after his mother is killed in a bombing raid. While there he is stalked by a talking Gray Heron (Masaki Suda) who leads him into a magical otherworld that only he can save. Being a Studio Ghibli film it goes without saying that it is stunningly gorgeous in both the background art and the character design. The horror and devastation of the war is very evocative, bringing to mind the earlier Ghibli film Grave of the Fireflies (amazing film, incredibly depressing), but I found that the story became overly convoluted once the Heron is introduced. The score from long-time Ghibli composer Joe Hisaishi is excellent and I really enjoyed the performance of Suda as the Heron, malicious at first before being forced to work with Mahito. Not on the level of Miyazaki's greatest films – My Neighbour Totoro, Spirited Away, Howl's Moving Castle – this is still a beautiful and heartfelt work of art. 8.5/10 The Da Vinci Code dir. Ron Howard/2006/2h29m When there is a murder in the Louvre – the corpse covered in mysterious symbols – symbology expert Robert Langdon (Ton Hanks) is called in and uncovers an ancient conspiracy concerning the bloodline of Jesus Christ. This is a load of old sh*te. Hanks gives the worst performance I've seen him give as he spouts nonsensical dialogue whilst wearing one of the worst hairpieces in film history. A supporting cast of really good actors – Audrey Tatou, Paul Bettany, Ian McKellen – can't help save this tripe. Alfred Molina plays a character called Bishop Aringarosa, which is Italian for red herring, that's the level we're working at here. There's also a car chase early on that is edited so badly that it gave me a headache. This must have been a tax write-off. 2/10 Queen Rock Montreal dir. Saul Swimmer/1982/1h35m This concert film, recorded in late 1981, sees Queen at the height of their powers doing exactly what the title says. You know they're not messing around when they open with the one two combo of We Will Rock You and Let Me Entertain You, a mission statement if ever there was one. The stage show is simple, but they get great use out of their lighting rig and some smoke. I loved the bit during Get Down, Make Love where it turned into a 50s sci-fi film. Of course the star of the show is Freddie Mercury, strutting around in a Superman vest like he is the man of steel, but every member gets a chance to shine. Brian May even gets more costume changes than Freddie does! This is one of the greatest concert films I've seen up there with Aretha Franklin's Amazing Grace and Talking Heads Stop Making Sense. An hour and a half of the best rock you'll ever hear and the recent IMAX restoration makes it look as good as it sounds. 10/10 Lime's Film of the Week! Menilmontant dir. Dimitri Kirsanoff/1926/38m This experimental silent film tells the story of two sisters who move to the city from the country after their parents are brutally killed by an axe murderer in a shockingly brutal opening scene. The story here is told totally visually as the film doesn't use any intertitles telling us what people are saying or giving exposition. This results in some brilliant editing, especially when the sisters arrive in the big city for the first time and we get to experience their shock and awe, overwhelmed by noise and movement from every side. The story is kept simple, one sister works hard one likes to party, but it's all in the telling. The two lead actors, Nadia Sibirskaia and Yolande Beaulieu, give very expressive performances with some wonderfully lit close ups showcasing them. 7/10 The Bond dir. Charlie Chaplin/1918/9m This short film is a piece of wartime propaganda encouraging US citizens to buy Liberty Bonds and help the war effort. We see several sketches highlighting different bonds – friendship, marriage etc – before the most important bond, Liberty Bonds. He then beats up The Kaiser (Syd Chaplin, Charlie's older brother). This isn't an entertaining film but rather an interesting historical document. It's very minimalist in design, all shot on a bare black stage, maybe because they want to keep the focus on the message. Chaplin would have a bigger impact during WWII with the release of The Great Dictator which you should all watch. This, you can take it or leave it. 5/10

It's What's Inside (2024) dir Greg Jardin A low-budget, very mild horror / fantasy (not sci-fi, no science in this) / mystery drama. 8 mid-20s friends from college, 4 male, 4 female, get together for a party. I won't bother naming the actors; I didn't recognise any of them and all 8 are pretty much equally in the main roles. The party is hosted by brothers Reuben and Denis at the country house, somewhere in the USA, left to them by their wealthy artist-mother, full of her weird art-works. Last to arrive is Forbes, who some have not seen since college. We learn he got expelled following a party where his high-school sister got drunk, did some crazy stuff and ended up in a psychiatric hospital. Forbes now runs a gaming company. But it's not video games or board games. These are very strange types of game where the players basically plug their minds into a machine. He gives them a very quick “game” to start with, to demonstrate what it does. We don't see exactly what the characters experience during this, but it's clear they have some sort of hallucinations. After that all, eventually, agree to a longer game, where they experience even stranger things. I can't say more on that without major spoilers, just that we start to learn more about things that went on at college, something goes very wrong and the police end up involved. If it had just been this sort of thing I might have given it a higher score, but then they add on a bit at the end with a number of plot twists that just seemed unnecessary to me. I did find it confusing at times, again can't say exactly why without spoilers, and the plot twists at the end were confusing too. It tended to have the feel of something more like a high-school story about relationships; e.g. A wanted to date B, but B was more into C, so A ended up with D, and now D has found out, etc etc. The music was good, a mix of original (I think) and some Beethoven. Acting was nothing special, but it didn't require anything special. Some of the camera work and editing was fairly original, split screen with sometimes different filters on each part of the screen. I also quite liked one line about one of them who is a social-media influencer, I cannot remember the exact quote, but it was something like “No you do not work, you just take selfies and post them on Instagram. That's not a job!” 5 / 10

I agree @djw180 The Fall of the House of Usher is worth a watch for Mark Hamill’s performance alone. Plus, I’ve been on the fence about watching Kaos. I will definitely give it a go now. Thanks!

What I Watched This Week #147 (Oct 21-27) Green Room dir. Jeremy Saulnier/2015/1h35m Punk band The Ain't Rights take a last minute gig while touring but unfortunately the club, located in the middle of nowhere, is run and frequented by neo-n*zi skinheads led by a malevolent Patrick Stewart as Darcy, playing very much against type. After antagonising the crowd by playing the classic Dead Kennedys song n*zi Punks f*ck Off and seeing something they shouldn't they end up in a siege situation, locked in the green room. This is a taut and tense thriller that treats the situation realistically, making the threat seem even greater. If you've seen the director's revenge film Blue Ruin then this has a similar tone and approach to the material. Scenes of violence are quick, sloppy and unspectacular making the consequences impactful. Stewart is excellent here, playing his role with a calm menace that always feels threatening. Out of the rest of the cast the standout is Anton Yelchin as the band's guitarist Pat. Like all the best punk songs this is a brutal assault on the senses. 8.5/10 The Miu Miu Affair dir. Laura Citarella/2024/30m This short film is a companion piece to the director's over four hour feature Trenque Lauquen , sharing similar themes and the same cast playing different characters. Luxury clothing brand Miu Miu, part of Prada, are hosting a show in a small town in the Argentinian countryside, Trenque Lauquen, when one of their models goes missing – the search for a mysteriously vanished woman also being the main plot thread of the feature. The search is conducted by world weary detective Maria Jose (Veronica Llinas) and her clairvoyant assistant Lidia (Laura Parades). This is a film that is playful with its wry humour but always retains an enigmatic, mysterious atmosphere. Citarella's two films in the Trenque universe remind me in places of the world of Twin Peaks just less surreal. The two lead performances are both great and the character types juxtapose really well with each other. I hope I get the chance to visit this world again sooner rather than later. 9/10 Lime's Film of the Week! Terrifier 2 dir. Damien Leone/2022/2h18m Art the Clown (David Howard Thornton) is back in time for Halloween, this time hunting down teenage girl Sienna (Lauren LaVera) who is the only person in the world who can kill him thanks to a prophetic vision and magic sword from her comic book artist father. So one of my biggest gripes with the first Terrifier is that there are no characters and no story. Here, Leone has gone too far in the other direction because this has way too much story and it's all stupid, as are the characters. This is nearly two and a half hours long and for a film that tries so hard to be edgy and shocking the main thing I felt during this was boredom. There's one notorious scene in this film that I thought was overly malicious and not fun to watch. Not that I was offended, it was just trying too hard, and the longer it went on it became less shocking because of it. The practical effects are very effective but sometimes you should go for the whole less-is-more thing. Like the first film, what saves this is Thornton's performance. He's very compelling to watch but again, like the gore, the more there is the less scary it becomes and I think we spend too much time with him. Imagine spending half of the Halloween film following around Michael Myers. By the end he'd be just some guy. 3/10 High Tension dir. Alexandre Aja/2003/1h31m High Tension is a French slasher about two young women, Marie and Alex (Cecile de France, Maiwenn), spending time at Alex's parent's country house when it is invaded by a man (Phillipe Nahon) who kills Alex's family and abducts her, with Marie spending the rest of the film trying to save her. The two lead performances are solid enough, and Nahon has a menacing presence, but the big twist towards the end didn't really work for me. This would've worked better as a straight-forward slasher, but it tries to be too clever. The first act, which is basically a home invasion film. is well done with some very tense scenes and quick, violent bursts of brutality but the rest of the film can't match that atmosphere. 5.5/10 Witchfinder General dir. Michael Reeves/1968/1h27m Vincent Price stars as real historical figure Matthew Hopkins who was responsible for hundreds of witch hangings during the English Civil War in the mid 17th century. This film follows Hopkins and his brutish right hand man John Stearne (Robert Russell) as the conduct one of their hunts. Although not totally historically accurate, especially the ending, this has the ring of authenticity to it, in large part thanks to Price's performance. He plays Hopkins without any of his usual camp theatricality, making him monstrously methodical and cold. There's a calmness to him in the torture and execution scenes that is chilling. Next to him Russell feels like he's overacting a little but his character is a good contrast to Hopkins. The low budget is evident and none of the supporting cast really stand out, not that they're bad, but this is still a suitably bloody account of one of the darkest parts of England's history. 7/10 Starve Acre dir. Daniel Kokotajlo/2023/1h38m Starve Acre is a British folk horror starring Matt Smith and Morfydd Clark as Richard and Juliette, a couple grieving the death of their son while staying at Richard's father's farm, which he recently inherited. A local folk tale and a dead rabbit are just the first signs of something evil haunting the land. This is a slow burn of a film that spends a lot of time establishing character, particularly that of Richard who is an archaeologist - that connection with the land being an important theme here. There's a great use of the beautifully bleak Yorkshire countryside, the landscapes dominating the film at times. The slow introduction of supernatural elements is done so that it could be read as part of their trauma before they totally take over in the final act. Smith and Clark are good here, their pain and grief coming across are real and painful. As folk horrors go this is pretty standard fare with nothing especially unique – my measuring stick in this genre being the incredible Enys Men – but it's well made and worth watching. 7.5/10 Slay dir. Jem Garrard/2024/1h39m Priscilla Queen of the Desert meets From Dusk Till Dawn when four drag queens – Trinity the Tuck, Heidi N Closet, Crystal Methyd, Cara Melle – are accidentally booked to perform in a biker bar that they soon have to help defend against a horde of vampires. This is a fun and campy film that knows exactly what it is and plays to its strengths by remaining consistently silly. The four leads are great with each having a distinct role in the group, but I thought that most of the supporting characters were just annoying, especially one called Sheila (Robyn Scott), but I did like the owner/bartender Dusty (Neil Sandilands) who gets a fabulous final act costume change. This is another film where the low budget is obvious but it does well to pull off a grungy yet glittery feel. This is most definitely more a comedy than a horror, and they really pack in the jokes here. Sadly a lot of them are misses, even more if you don't like the overly theatrical drag queen style, but the occasional hits are hilarious. Not amazing but this is still some decent light hearted fun for spooky season. 6.5/10

The Thing (1982) dir John Carpenter A classic John Carpenter horror, a remake of the 1950s The Thing From Outer Space. A group of scientists stranded at an Antarctic research station are attacked by an alien parasite that takes over the body of it's victims and attempts to create a new creature based on the host so it can remain undetected. The scientists don't know who is still human and who has been taken over by the alien. Kurt Russel stars and the score is by Ennio Morricone. It's not really my sort of thing, a bit too gory and gruesome and over-the-top with the special effects, but it's meant to be like that. Kurt Russel is fine but some of the support actors are not. There's a few flaws in the plot, like why does a team of scientists have access to so many flame throwers and other weapons, but it's not meant to be taken too seriously so you have to forgive that. It's good at what it is supposed to be. The score is quite subtle, not one of Morricone's epics that you might listen to on it's own, but it adds to the atmosphere of the film. 7 / 10 The Invitation (2022) dir Jessica Thompson Nathalie Emmanuel stars in modern day gothic horror. She plays Evie, a young woman from New York who discovers she has some very rich relatives in England and accepts an invitation to a wedding at a country estate. She and the owner fall for each other but the mansion is also home to a monster. I won't say exactly what sort of monster, although the trailer probably gives it away. The interior is gothic style with spooky statues, sealed off rooms and dark corridors. Some of the waitresses hired for the wedding start to disappear. There's clear references to other types of story. Evie actually says at one point something like that she is in a Jane Austin story. Then there's references to Dracula, not only the basic story and style of he interior of the mansion but it is supposed to be set near Whitby. It's sort of done like a modern day Jane Austen story that half way through switches to horror, a bit like how From Dusk to Dawn suddenly becomes a vampire film. But this has a few horror elements earlier on too, and those are not very well done. They are a bit too cliched and not really that scary. One of them also makes no sense given how the story pans out with the monster almost revealing itself too soon, as if it / the film makers could not resist it reaching out a spooky clawed hand to tap Evie on the shoulder. The acting is fine but the script is a little unimaginative at times. The sets are OK but the exterior of the mansion looks nothing like anything you would find in England, because it's not English, as the film was mainly shot in Hungary. Also the mansion looks very new rather than the hundreds of year's old it was supposed to be. Also with respect to the setting, it's supposed to be in Yorkshire, where Whitby is, yet there is not one Yorkshire accent to be heard. That's fair enough for the lord of the manor, his aristocratic friends and other wedding guests, but you would think at least one of the staff, caterers or people in the nearby village would have an authentic accent. 5 / 10

DROP ZONE - SANDY SHORES Players: 2-30 Teams: 2-4 Default Time: 10m:00s Time of Day: Morning Weather: Bright Weapons: Forced & Pick-Up Published: 20 October 2024 Last Update: 28 October 2024 DESCRIPTION Jump from platforms and claim the drop zone to earn points. Don't forget to grab your parachute OVERVIEW King of the hill mode setup like the R* adversary mode, Drop Zone. Start with a SMG on a platform. SMG, Heavy Sniper, MG, Grenade Launcher, and Grenade pickups. Bookmark Job _ See more of my creations _

What I Watched This Week #144 (Sep 30-Oct 6) Gandahar dir. Rene Laloux/1987/1h23m This French animated sci-fi tells the story of the planet Gandahar and an attack by mysterious Metal Men from the future. One warrior must set out to stop the threat and save the planet. This is from the same director as a film called Fantastic Planet and it shares the same truly alien atmosphere, there's some really weird stuff in here. I also love the style of the art, it's like the cover of a 50s sci-fi novel or a 70s prog rock album. Unfortunately the animation itself is cheap and basic and reminded me of a Saturday morning cartoon. The plot is simple yet also convoluted in places it doesn't need to be. I only had the option to watch the English dub which is star studded with the likes of Christopher Plummer, Glenn Close and, randomly, magician duo Penn and Teller, but none of the performances really stand out. Slightly meandering and obtuse this is still a fun trip, especially if you're a lil high. 7/10 Free Solo dir. Elizabeth Chai Vasarhelyi, Jimmy Chin/2018/1h40m This documentary follows climber Alex Honnold as he prepares to become the first person to ascend the 3200 foot high sheer cliff face of El Capitan in Yosemite National Park free solo, which means without the aid of any ropes or safety equipment. As a subject Honnold is interesting in that he's quite boring excepting the fact that he has the most extreme hobby in the world. His whole life is so focused on this incredible feat that it's to the detriment of his relationships, but when you see what he's doing you can understand why he needs to be like that. He describes free soloing at one point as the ultimate quest for perfection. When he climbs there is absolutely no room for error and he compares it to competing at the Olympics except that you have to win the gold medal and set a new record otherwise you'll die, that's how flawless he needs to be. But the most remarkable thing about this film is the footage of the actual climb, with co-director Jimmy Chin, himself a climber, working with Honnold to ensure that the crew don't distract him and cause him to fall thousands of feet to his death like so many of his fellow free solo climbers. It felt like I was holding my breath for the entire last half hour of this film, it's the scariest non-horror I've ever seen. 9/10 The Professor dir. Charlie Chaplin/1919/7m The Professor is a fragment of an unfinished film. The only sequence shot has Chaplin playing a flea trainer, Professor Bosco, spending a night in a homeless shelter where his box of fleas is upturned, the escaped performers causing chaos for the other residents. Despite being only a short fragment I still really enjoyed this and liked seeing Chaplin playing a different character. Like The tr*mp he's still down on his luck but there's an arrogance to him gives the perception that he used to be a success. And of course the physical comedy is of the highest standard, especially when he pulls out his whip in order to round up all of his fleas. It's a shame that he didn't finish this film or do anything more with this character. 7/10 Raya and the Last Dragon dir. Don Hall, Carlos Lopez Estrada/2021/1h47m Kelly Marie Tran stars as the titular Raya, a warrior who must track down the last dragon, Sisu (Awkwafina), in order to vanquish an ancient evil and unite the fractured clans of her land while also working on her trust issues which she developed as a child. This is a gorgeous looking film and I really like the design of the fictional world of Kumandra in which it takes place but the story is kind of bland and uninteresting. Raya is a very straight-forward main character with the humour in the film coming from Sisu but I just found her annoying and Awkwafina's performance just doesn't really fit the tone of the film. One thing I did miss from this film is the fact that Disney seem to be moving away from the musical style again as none of the characters sing. This isn't a bad film by any means, and there are more things I liked than I didn't, but it doesn't come close to being considered a Disney classic. 6/10 Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery dir. Jay Roach/1997/1h34m 60s superspy Austin Powers (Mike Myers) is unfrozen in the late 90s in order to battle his arch nemesis Dr. Evil (also Myers) and save the world with the help of the very shagadelic Vanessa Kensington (Elizabeth Hurley). This lovingly spoofs pretty much every aspect of the James Bond franchise but it also works if you've never seen a Bond film in your life. Powers as a character is instantly iconic, introduced in a brilliant title sequence set to Quincy Jones's Soul Bossa Nova, and I love the fact that Myers didn't make him an incompetent idiot for comedic effect. Just like Bond, Powers is ridiculous but also very good at his job. Dr. Evil is just as memorable a character and is a perfect send up of the classic Bond villain Blofeld. His relationship with his angsty teenage son Scott (Seth Green) is one of my favourite parts of this film. The script is packed full of jokes and most of them are still hilarious today because they don't rely on cheap pop culture references that become instantly outdated like a lot of spoof films do. 9/10 Lime's Film of the Week! Bone Tomohawk dir. S. Craig Zahler/2015/2h13m Bone Tomahawk is a western horror starring Kurt Russell as Sheriff Hunt who needs to track down a tribe of cannibals after they kidnap a local woman. Russell is always a solid lead and he gives a great performance here, as do several of the supporting cast like Matthew Fox and Richard Jenkins, but the overall feeling I got from this film is that it's pretty racist. It's like the filmmaker wanted a justification for slaughtering a load of Native Americans to the point that he literally dehumanises them, making them some strange, mutated monsters. Watching it I was thinking about the classic John Ford film The Searchers in which John Wayne plays a man searching for his niece who was kidnapped by a tribe of Native Americans. In that film his character is not the hero, he is a man full of hatred even before his niece is captured and would have found any excuse to kill as many of them as he can. By the end of the film he realises what he is and in an incredible final shot walks away from civilisation and out into the desert. I feel like the director of this film watched The Searchers and totally missed the point. But there is a pretty cool scene where a dude gets hacked in half lengthways. 4/10

I just finished watching The Fall of the House of Usher on Netflix. Highly recommended! It's a horror-drama in 8 episodes, very loosely based on Edgar Allen Poe short stories or poems with each episode named after a different work of his. I have never read any of them and some had not even heard of, but I now at least know the brief synopsis of them from Wikipedia. What the creators have done is woven together a plot primarily based on the short story "The Fall of the House of Usher" that greatly expands on that. The first episode has the same name as the whole series. Roderick Usher, corrupt billionaire head of a major pharmaceutical company, invites an old adversary, lawyer August Dupin, to his family's derelict house, to confess to a host of crimes. Dupin has been trying to prosecute the Ushers for decades but they always got away with it. Now, following the recent deaths of all six of his children, supposedly in freak, horrific, unrelated accidents, Roderick wants to come clean. Most of the story is now told in flash back, both to the early years of Roderick and his sister Maddie (the brains behind their rise to power) and the children's recent deaths. The next 6 episode each focus on the violent deaths of a different son or daughter, each related in some way to the Edgar Allen Poe story that episode is named after. The final episode, The Raven, then brings everything to it's conclusion, revealing the true cause of all that has happened. It's very, very good. It is a bit bloody and gory at times, but never over-the-top, always done for a reason and usually to fit in with the story that death is named after. It features Mark Hamil in the most un-Luke-Skywalker-like role you can imagine. I never really rated him as an actor in Star Wars, but here, as the Usher's ruthless lawyer he is excellent. Another Netflix series I think is worth a mention is Kaos It's a modern day story of Greek Gods and Heroes, in a world where they most definitely exist and are still worshipped by mortals. Jeff Goldblum is Zeus and there's other recognisable faces amongst the rest of the cast, including David Thewlis as one of Zeus' brothers and fellow god Hades and Suzie Izzard as one of the Fates. It loosely follows the story of Orpheus in the Underworld, but this is part of a bigger plot with both gods and mortals having to accept what fate has in store for them, whether they like it or not.

The Bad Sleep Well (1960) dir Akira Kurosawa A film inspired by the William Shakespeare play Hamlet. But its not the story of Hamlet simply transposed to a mid twentieth century Japanese setting, rather it shares some of the same plot elements. If I hadn't known in advance this was inspired by Hamlet I am not sure I would have picked up on that. I certainly would not call this an adaptation of Hamlet. It's not like how The Magnificent Seven is The Seven Samurai or Cruel Intentions is Dangerous Liaisons, in different settings. It's much more subtle. What is similar is either something you could find in many stories or is changed from what was in Hamlet. There is a man seeking revenge for the death of this father and a brother being very protective of his sister, but those are hardly unique Shakespearian plot elements. Then there are things like a “ghost” appearing, except in this case its not a ghost but a man thought to be dead who is not, or a situation set up to make an accusation in a way that only those guilty are going to understand, but done differently and at a completely different point in the story to when that happens in Hamlet. But all that takes nothing away from the film itself, which is very good. It stars Toshiro Mifune as Koichi Nishi, a young man, marrying into the family of the wealthy CEO of a big corporation, accused of financial and other crimes. Nishi's father was killed (forced to take his own life) some years earlier so that he would appear to take the blame for one of the corporation's misdemeanours. Nishi's existence was not known to the company as he was the son of his father's mistress and never publicly acknowledged. So now he has taken a new identity, befriended the son of the CEO and married the daughter, getting a job as the CEO's PA. He is as respectful to his new wife as he can be. He knows he has deceived her and because of that does not sleep with her. It starts at their wedding, which is interrupted by the police come of arrest one of the company managers and it becomes clear the detectives are after the CEO too, but don't yet have enough evidence. Nishi's job goes further than being a PA and he is tasked with ensuring another company fall guy commits suicide, so he is clearly highly trusted by his boss. It's now just a matter of putting in motion the final parts of his plan to bring down those who killed his father. It's well made and acted and the story progresses nicely. There are some good scenes of Nishi and his wife. She clearly loves her husband and he is clearly torn between pursuing his goals and the guilt he feels towards her. It doesn't go too far in terms of action, no chase scenes, no big shoot-outs or anything like that. It's about the story telling. 8 / 10

DROP ZONE - HUMANE LABS Players: 2-30 Teams: 2-4 Default Time: 10m:00s Time of Day: Morning Weather: Bright Weapons: Forced & Pick-Up Published: 9 November 2024 Last Update: - DESCRIPTION Jump from platforms and claim the drop zone to earn points. Don't forget to grab your parachute OVERVIEW King of the hill mode setup like the R* adversary mode, Drop Zone. Start with a SMG on a platform with some SMG, Heavy Sniper, MG, and Grenade pickups. Some props have been added to give extra rooftop access. Bookmark Job _ See more of my creations _

Nice! This will be featured in the next Two Bros playlist.

Updated the following; Added platforms just below the surface of the Alamo Sea so players will die if they land without a parachute, rather than surviving out in the sea and having to waste time swimming to shore. However, landing out there with a parachute will still require swimming. Added a few vehicles to the map. Nothing fast or powerful, mostly things you'd expect to see in Sandy Shores. Added traffic. I messed around with the options in creator and decided that Very High was ideal since Sandy Shores has limited traffic, but will change it if there turns out to be too much traffic.

I've removed the 5 seconds from the shrinking area. It will now be instant death once pushed outside.

@djw180 I hate-read the book years ago so I was prepared for some sh*t but I forgot just how awful Dan Brown's writing is. The BFI subscription is great and probably the one I get the most use out of, just today I watched a pretty good new folk horror set in Yorkshire called Starve Acre. And I know you're gonna love the Kurosawa films, all three of his Shakespeare adaptations are incredible, especially Throne of Blood (Macbeth) and Ran (King Lear).

@LimeGreenLegend - loving that you hate The Da Vinci Code! The cheesy line that goes something like "quick - we must find a library!" sums it up. Stephen Fry described the book as "loose stool water" I think, and the film is arguably worse. Also I will be getting BFI player in a couple of weeks time to start on the Kurosawa Shakespeare films.

Lola (2022) dir Andrew Legge In the early 1940s, English sisters Thomasina (Emma Appleton) and Martha (Stefani Martini) invent a machine they name Lola, after their late mother. Lola can play bits of TV and Radio from the future. So with Britain at war, they begin to use Lola to find out where the next bombing raid is going to hit and send out anonymous warnings. The government naturally want to find out where these warnings are coming from and a Lt. Holloway (Rory Fleck Byrne) tracks them down. Army intelligence now takes over, but Thom and Mart (as they call each other) are allowed to carry on operating Lola, from their home, with Holloway assisting them and, at first, dealing with any confidential information that helps verify Lola's predictions. I won't much say more, unlike the brief description Film-4 gave that spoiled the main plot element. It's probably needless to say that some strange things might happen when you start messing with time and events start to deviate from what we know actually took place in WWII. It's cleverly made, mixing 1940s news-reel footage with the modern day actors, and cutting bits of different speeches made by historical figures together to have them seeming to be talking about the alternative history that emerges. (That in itself is an interesting lesson in how fake news can easily be created). It's all shot in the style of a 1940's film made on a small hand held camera, as you can see from the trailer. The way it's set up is that in 2021 someone discovers a reel of film 1940s and this is what we are watching. It's a film Mart put together from bits footage she, Thom and Lt Holloway had made. So it is intentionally quite low quality. Early on this was starting to get annoying and I was hoping it would switch to a modern-day wide-screen film. But it didn't, and I did get used to it. So it worked in the end. The acting is fine, but nothing special was really required. The plot is a bit implausible at times. I can't believe that army intelligence would have let Mart and Thom continue working on Lola from their own home, they would have taken it to somewhere very top secret. Also they would not have allowed the sisters to make the decisions about where military resources get deployed based on what they find with Lola, as happens in the film. But it's a low budget film, they clearly wanted to keep a lot of it in one set (the sister's house) and limit the number of other actors required. Overall an interesting story, made in a unusual way, and at only 1 hr 20mins worth a watch. 7 / 10

What I Watched This Week #143 (Sep 23-29) Calvary dir. John Michael McDonagh/2014/1h42m Brendon Gleeson stars as Father James Lavelle, a priest who is told during confession that he will be murdered in one week by an unseen person who was abused by a priest when he was a child. He will be killed because murdering a good, innocent priest will cause more outrage than killing a r*pist. We then follow him over the following week as he prepares for death. This is a very dark comedy that treats very serious subjects in an offhand manner that is quite disarming and cynical, but also at times very funny. I think it's interesting that a film about s*xual abuse in the Catholic church has a priest as the only good character in a town full of *ssholes. It does get tiresome just how obnoxiously bleak everyone's outlook is, but some fine performances from the likes of Aidan Gillen and Dylan Moran stop it from getting too grating. Gleeson really carries the film with his thoughtful, nuanced performance. 7/10 Ring dir. Hideo Nakata/1998/1h36m This influential Japanese horror film stars Nanako Matsushima as journalist Reiko Asakawa, investigating an urban legend about a videotape that sees anyone who watches it die one week later. This simple premise is utilised excellently to craft a genuinely creepy story with twists coming right to the final scene. The actual footage on the videotape is also very well done with it feeling like something you shouldn't be watching. Outside of the cursed tape the direction and style of the film is quite flat and simple and not as atmospheric as I remember from last watching it as a teenager, but that normalcy makes the supernatural elements more effective. Matsushima is a good lead, especially after her child's life is put in danger and she becomes more and more frantic in trying to solve the mystery. The structure of the film, split into the seven days Reiko has to save her life, builds up the tension nice and slowly. 8.5/10 The New Janitor dir. Charlie Chaplin/1914/12m An early Chaplin short made while he was still under his first film contract with the legendary Keystone company sees him in guise as the little tr*mp who has found employment as the janitor of a bank. There, he becomes smitten with the secretary (Peggy Page) and stops one of the managers from robbing the place to pay off his gambling debts. While not yet fully formed all of the pieces of what made him a genius are here, maybe excepting his sweetly sentimental humanism – something that all came together in perfect harmony for the first time in The Kid from 1921. This is a very typical film full of slapstick and charm that will put a smile on your face. Compared to other films of the time this is top tier stuff, but knowing what Chaplin is capable of it falls a bit flat. 6/10 Billy Connolly: Big Banana Feet dir. Murray Grigor/1977/1h17m This documentary follows comedian Billy Connolly at the end of his 1975 tour, which culminated in him playing shows in Dublin, Ireland followed by Belfast in the north of Ireland which was a very dangerous place at that time. Shot in a purely observational, fly-on-the-wall style, the film makes you feel like you are part of the tour and the lack of interviews or even any acknowledgement of the camera at all makes it feel raw and real. Connolly is a wonderful subject and here his natural wit and charm shine through even in the most mundane moments. It never feels like he's putting on an act. I've always been a huge fan of his, but was never really familiar with this early part of his career where he was still more of a folk musician who told jokes between songs, and I have to say that I loved it. His whole stage presence and way of telling a story is so engaging that I could've watched another couple of hours of this. 9/10 Lime's Film of the Week! Born of Fire dir. Jamil Dehlavi/1987/1h24m This surreal art-house horror film follows an astronomer (Suzan Crowley) and a classical musician (Peter Firth) drawn to each other through strange visions of the Earth burning and something about his father and he has a flute battle for the future of humanity with a strange naked god who can shoot fire from his eyes and plays the flute like a demon. This is a weird one with an elusive plot but incredible atmosphere and imagery, with some gorgeous locations in Turkey being used to full effect. The performances are pretty flat but that kind of adds to the ethereal otherworldliness of the piece. The music is great and works really well with the psychedelic, surreal mood. I'm still not sure what the scene where a woman gives birth to a giant moth means though. 7/10 Three Pixar Shorts: Geri's Game dir. Jan Pinkava/1997/4m For the Birds dir. Ralph Eggleston/2000/3m Boundin' dir. Bud Luckey/2003/5m These three Pixar shorts were all made after the release of Toy Story and their main focus became feature length films, but they all still show an evolution of the artform and the way it is used to tell stories and convey emotion. Geri's Game is about an old man having a game of chess against himself and shows the progress they were making in the animation of human characters and facial expressions. Although it looks dated now this was a huge leap at the time in making human CGI characters feel real and alive. For the Birds is about a goofy, gangly bird trying to fit in with a group of smaller birds and to me is Pixar experimenting with feather and fur textures, which would culminate with the release of Monsters Inc the following year. Boundin' is a musical short about a sheep who makes friends with a jackalope and to me is the weakest of the three. I just wasn't a fan of the character design, but the narration, by director Luckey, is well done. What has made Pixar so successful over the years is all evident in these short films, no matter how impressive the technical achievements are the focus is always on telling a story, no matter how simple it is. I'll give these a combined rating of 7/10

The Abyss - Avgrunden (2023) – dir Richard Holm Not the 1989 James Cameron deep-sea film, but a more recent Swedish disaster movie. A mining town in northern Sweden is at risk of sinking into a massive cave inadvertently opened up by the mine. The main character is Frigga (Tuva Novotny) the mine's head of security. I think her title may be mistranslation by Netflix's subtitle writers as her job seems more Head of Safety than Security to me. But anyway, she monitors the relatively mild, but frequent, earth tremors that the mining triggers and it is her job to make the call on if / when particular operations should be halted. Some parts of the town are already being relocated to a safer nearby site as there are cracks in the ground starting to appear. Some areas are fenced off, but, of course, the local high school kids go into those areas anyway. Shortly after the film begins it all starts to get worse, much worse. Novotny is good in the lead role and the support includes Peter Frantzen, probably most well known as King Harald Finehair in Vikings. It's not like a big Holywood disaster movie. There's much less of the special effects and more about the acting and plot. But the special effects it does have are impressive. They make massive cracks appear in the road and have cars slowly sinking into the ground. There's some good, scary underground scenes too and early on this is probably not a film for anyone who is claustrophobic. Rather than the usual one big disaster with a ever diminishing group of survivors eventually escaping, it's more a series of mini-disasters that Frigga and her colleagues / family have to deal with. 8 / 10

Platinum number 40 - Beat Saber! The most physically demanding platinum I'll likely ever get, but also one of the most fun. Worth getting a PSVR2 just for this.